By Vanessa Trum
EDI 600: Psychological Foundation of Education
College of Education
Long Island University, C. W. Post
April 9, 2010
To be honest, in the beginning of class, I felt that the roadblocks to communication would really help certain situations. When my friends or family come to me with a problem, I am usually quick to come up with possible solutions for them or give positive feedback to make them feel better. I do not like to see any of my friends or family upset and I usually want to come up with ways to solve their problems. Like you said however, it is not our problem, but theirs. It is our job as a friend to be there to just listen. Sometimes I get upset if I just want to vent and the person I am talking to will take someone else’s side or tell me I am wrong.
I took what I learned in class and used it last night when I was speaking with my boyfriend. He had a rough day at work and has a dilemma. He does not know what to do about something work related. We work together and I know everyone he works directly with, so it is easy to talk about work with each other. I told him to explain to me what was going on and he did. I was an active listener, asking questions and asking him to repeat some things a few times because I did not hear or understand what he said. I nodded and made sure he knew I was listening. I realized that he never asked me for advice, but he just really needed me to listen, and I did. The conversation went really well. When he asked me how my day went, I told him what happened. I had a rough day as well and he just listened. I noticed that he was a very good active listener and did not use any of the 12 roadblocks to communication. The conversation went very well on both our parts. He thanked me in the end for listening. Thanks for the advice!
Long Island University, C. W. Post
April 9, 2010
To be honest, in the beginning of class, I felt that the roadblocks to communication would really help certain situations. When my friends or family come to me with a problem, I am usually quick to come up with possible solutions for them or give positive feedback to make them feel better. I do not like to see any of my friends or family upset and I usually want to come up with ways to solve their problems. Like you said however, it is not our problem, but theirs. It is our job as a friend to be there to just listen. Sometimes I get upset if I just want to vent and the person I am talking to will take someone else’s side or tell me I am wrong.
I took what I learned in class and used it last night when I was speaking with my boyfriend. He had a rough day at work and has a dilemma. He does not know what to do about something work related. We work together and I know everyone he works directly with, so it is easy to talk about work with each other. I told him to explain to me what was going on and he did. I was an active listener, asking questions and asking him to repeat some things a few times because I did not hear or understand what he said. I nodded and made sure he knew I was listening. I realized that he never asked me for advice, but he just really needed me to listen, and I did. The conversation went really well. When he asked me how my day went, I told him what happened. I had a rough day as well and he just listened. I noticed that he was a very good active listener and did not use any of the 12 roadblocks to communication. The conversation went very well on both our parts. He thanked me in the end for listening. Thanks for the advice!
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